goodbye, 2016

goodbye 2016.

2016 is quickly coming to it's end. This dramatic, over the top, extra, "Really?", "Why me?", year is finally almost over. I'm not one for the "New Year, New Me" movement or even "New Year Resolutions" because quite honestly they NEVER make it through to the end of the year. They die around the end of January and may make a few appearances throughout the year... but for the most part it's a pretty fickle relationship. This year, however, I am making what I like to call, "God Goals". But before we get into that, let me explain this year and why the start to this blog post itself was so dramatic. Here we go.

I went into this year by being forced on stage to sing on the worship team. It was your normal Sunday service. Songs, dance, prophecy, etc. Until my pastor called me to the stage, did some prophecy, and then proceeded to force me on stage to sing. Fortunately, because God is a loving and caring God, He told me minutes before that this was going to happen. So, shoutout to the big man upstairs for giving me a minute to panic & a minute to find my trust in Him again. That was my first time singing publicly. I had sung in choir, in the back row, where no one could actually hear me. But otherwise, up until that point, my only audience were those behind their screens on Instagram and Snapchat. I don't think people understand how easy it is to sing on social media. I can record, hate it, & delete it as many times as I want before I find a 30 second clip that is "alright". I don't know if you realize, but that isn't a thing when you're on stage in front of people.

My first official initiation onto the worship team was singing an entire song by myself. So let me summarize what just happened in case you're confused. I went from never singing in front of people, posting 30 seconds or less clips on social media to singing an entire song as a soloist in front of a live audience. Are you starting to understand why I said 2016 was dramatic? And this is just a small portion of the nonsense that went on this year.

At the end of January I lost my full time job to go on a 10 day missions trip to Thailand. Yes, I lost my permanent full time job that paid the bills to go and minister in a foreign country. That's what happens when you serve a God who doesn't abide by the rules of the prison that money can create for us. Of course what normally happens on a missions trip happened. Yes, my world was rocked and everything that used to matter, didn't, and everything that should've mattered before, was now at the forefront of my mind. Oh, and I sang that same solo song 7/10 days in front of an audience that didn't understand a single word I was singing. God likes to push the boundaries of my comfort zone quickly and on a large scale all the time. I guess He knows He created a tough girl. 

I won't write a paragraph for each individual event that has happened this year. I'll end up boring myself and most likely you. So I'll briefly summarize and get to my point of this whole post. This year I've house/dog sat, been a production assistant on multiple tv/award shows, helped sort a friend's house/finances, and worked as a production associate for a iPhone case company. I started shooting photography this year, which I said I'd never do. I've started working on my body painting book again. I've shot videography for choreographers. I started being faithful to my YouTube channel and vlogging, which you should check out, by the way. I'll stop the list and just say that this year has been a winding road that crossed through many different cities.

Ending 2016, I am still being pushed out of my comfort zone. Just a year ago I was being forced to sing on stage and now last week God told me I was going to be the new youth worship leader. Sure enough a couple days later the youth pastors asked me to lead, sing and play the guitar. Yet again, another thing I do not do in front of others, play the guitar. But, I'm learning to be comfortable with the uncomfortable, maybe even enjoying it. It's where I do my best growing. 

I started this year by picking two words I wanted to define my year, "Limitless" and "Able". Those two words along side God have carried me through this year. I decided at the beginning of 2016 that I would say "Yes" to opportunities before the enemy had the chance to tell me I couldn't. And I can say that this year I've done the most growing spiritually and mentally than ever. 

As I go into 2017, I have "God goals". Goals I won't be trying to accomplish on my own, but with God. I have goals to travel, be financially sound, be spiritually more in tune, dive historically & hebraically deep into scripture, pray for my future, find the true meaning of being single in the Kingdom, and get my temple in order. By temple, I mean my body. My body is a temple... if you read scripture... never mind. Anyways, I'm ready for 2017 to be another year of growth. It's going to be amazing.

Say yes to new opportunities. Knock fear down on it's behind and step forward into what God has for you. I promise, He won't let you down. He'll actually surprise you instead.

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this is a PSA: dream again